Bisexual Adventuress» lube

Pass me some more custard lube please

editor — Sun, 19 Apr 2009 10:29:14 +0000

I thought that I was probably alone in my adventures with custard. Well, OK perhaps not as alone as my rice pudding wrestling. But was supprised to see when I checked out what people had been searching on to reach my blog that a few people have been looking for custard knickers.

First of all let me explain a bit about my adventures with custard.

For those of you who have not tried this as home, the summary of my experiments goes like this.

Custard:

surprisingly good lube,
not too sweet and sickly to lick off,
less painful than candle wax as you can choose how hot you have it,
if you’re using some kind of plastic sheeting it all gets a bit slippery and is quite difficult to have sex once the custard is everywhere.

Rice Pudding:

makes and OK lube but be prepared to keep finding bits of rice for a while,
not to sweet for licking off,
less painful than candle wax and the bumpy texture feels good as it dribbles across the clit,
like custard it gets slippery if your using plastic sheeting, but wrestling is fun.

Good now we are all up to speed with the merits of custard and rice pudding in the bedroom.

The Beginner’s Guide To Electro Sex Toys

editor — Thu, 04 Sep 2008 20:08:11 +0000

For most people the words “electricity” and “genitalia” should never be combined! However, what is known as electro sex is becoming increasingly popular, not just with the BDSM community but with people who want a little something different to the usual thrusting and vibrations too.
The prospect of electricity and sex together is a little intimidating! The words alone conjure up all sorts of questions:
What does it feel like?

Will it hurt?

Will it leave marks?

Will I get superpowers if I use it?
All these questions are easily answered, but it seems no one is brave enough to do it! However, LoveHoney wants to take the mystery out of electro-sex and let you in on BDSM’s best kept secret!

What is electro sex?

Electro sex is a way of stimulating the genitals and erogenous zones with a safe amount of electrical energy. The human body is mostly made of water so is an excellent conductor of electricity. By applying a sex toy or conductive pad to the body, electricity can pass through the nerve cells creating pulsing, almost vibrating kinds of sensations.

How does electro sex work?

Imagine an electricity circuit: You have the battery, the wires, a variable and an outsource. In the case of electro sex, you have a power pack (the battery), a set of wires (the err… wires), a sex toy (the variable) and your body (the outsource)!

The power pack normally runs on a 9 volt battery, a fairly safe amount of electricity equivalent to 6 AAAA batteries. The energy from the power pack is transferred through the wires to the sex toy. Most electro sex toys are made of aluminium or another highly conductive metal, allowing energy to travel through easily. In order to work, there needs to be a way for the energy to leave the circuit – that exit being through you! By touching the toy the circuit is completed and the energy can flow outwards instead of round and round.

Scientific, eh? But that’s something you really don’t need to worry about! The important thing is the incredible and inimitable sensations that are created by this fantastic toy!

What does it feel like?

We have all been told since a very young age that electricity is dangerous and that if we come into contact with it, it will kill us (remember those chilling pylon adverts?)! And whilst we don’t advise you go out and climb into an electricity power station for sexual thrills, it is possible to safely and harmlessly enjoy electro sex.

Electrical stimulation doesn’t cause any pain or discomfort (unless you want it to)!

The lowest setting on the power pack gives you a pulsing sensation, not too dissimilar to a slow vibration. The mid-range setting gives you a tingling feeling; almost like pins and needles. You can tell there has been an increase in power but it is still not painful. To experience anything verging on pain you have to turn it up to the last quarter of power (usually settings 8, 9 and 10). Even then, it’s not painful in the traditional sense – it’s more like a dull, almost snapping sensation. Imagine pinging an elastic band against your skin numerous times in quick succession and you’ll be approaching a feeling similar to the top settings.

Is it safe?

In short, yes it is. The electricity allowed through the device is fairly minimal and can be compared to that of a TENS (Transcutaneous Electrical Nerve Stimulation) unit, as used in hospitals. It shouldn’t leave any marks or discolouration to the skin but you may be left with a tingly feeling for a little while afterwards.

However, as with anything, there are certain guidelines you should follow:

- Always use with the correct power pack and batteries.

- Do not use electro sex toys on the nipples unless the product specifies it has both positive and negative contacts on it.

- Do not use on broken or irritated skin.

- Do not use above the waist.

- Use a water-based lubricant to increase sensitivity and to avoid any skin tenderness.

- Do not use if you are pregnant or suffering from a heart condition, heart disease or epilepsy!

So, bottom line: Is it enjoyable?

YES! Electro sex toys can do the same job as a vibrator but with more unique and tantalising sensations! Rub the Mystim Lust Egg against the clitoris for a throbbing sensation that pulses through your nerve endings.

Whether you enjoy G-spot stimulation or a bit of anal fun, these distinctive sex toys can also be inserted to provide absolutely blissful internal feelings!

If you want a unique introduction to the kinkier side of things, then tie your partner to the bed with the Flirt Our First Bondage Kit, then try placing the ElectraPads on various areas of your partners body and turning up the ElectraStim Power Pack just enough so they can feel it buzzing! Being tied down and feeling the unbelievable sensations all over will be enough to send them to electro stimuli heaven!

The most important thing to remember with electro sex is that it will be different for everyone – whilst some will relish in the new sensations, others will find them too strong. Go slowly, use lots of lube and experiment with new toys at lower intensities. Before you know it, you’ll be inching your way to number 10 on the dial and purring with satisfaction!

Taste Test – Sliquid Swirl Blue Raspberry Flavoured Intimate Lubricant

editor — Thu, 28 Aug 2008 20:41:07 +0000

A SCIENTIFIC STUDY ON THE TASTE, TEXTURE AND SIDE EFFECTS OF AN INTIMATE LUBRICANT

A Report by Carly “Pleasure” Drew

Sliquid Swirl Glycerin Free Blue Rasperry Flavoured Lubricant is a 125ml bottle of clear water based gel which looks somewhat like bubble bath. I love a good bubble bath, especially whilst eating marshmallows, so this particular taste test already seems promising.
The short, rather cute looking bottle has lovely graphics and a lid that matches the packaging. This co-ordination of colours pleases me, especially as I notice that it also matches the bottle of water and tissues sat on my desk. I will put them all together to create a lovely display for anyone who chooses to visit me in my corner of the office.
Upon opening the sealed bottle, there is a faint, yet delicious fruity scent. I am slightly perplexed at the name of this product as it is listed as “blue raspberry”. From my previous research, I would have assumed a blue raspberry was in fact a blueberry. However, the smell is more of a general berry odour and, depending on your preference, can be assumed to be raspberry, blueberry or even blackberry.
My theory is that this intimate lubricant, with its multi-odoured properties and delightfully co-ordinated packaging (I have also discovered that it matches the trimming on my handbag so will place that in my ever growing museum of “things that match the Sliquid Swirl Glycerin Free Blue Rasperry Flavoured Lubricant bottle”), will be delicious in flavour and could be considered as one of my five-a-day of fruit and vegetables.

Hypothesis
In order to prove my theory that Sliquid Swirl Glycerin Free Blue Rasperry Flavoured Lubricant will taste simply magical in flavour, I intend to lick the product from the back of both hands (for an unbiased opinion) then produce a full report on my findings.

Experiment Diary
14.00 – Open bottle of Sliquid Swirl Glycerin Free Blue Rasperry Flavoured Lubricant and inhale the sweet, exquisite smell.
14.01 – Consider using the lubricant as a perfume.
14.02 – Sneeze loudly in a very quiet office and headbutt the bottle in the process.
14.04 – Rub lubricant with my little finger on to the back of one hand, then rub both hands together in a clockwise direction.
14.10 – The lubricant is still moist on the back of my hands, so even if it doesn’t taste like little pixies are caressing my taste buds, it certainly does the job as a lubricant.
14.12 – Lick the back of both hands whilst hiding behind my computer screen.
14.14 – Think about going out and buying some ice cream so the lubricant can be used as a delicious topping and/or sauce for it.

Findings
The Sliquid Swirl Glycerin Free Blue Rasperry Flavoured Lubricant was licked from my hands in short, gentle licks, having learnt my lesson from the previous taste test and wanting to avoid unnecessary gurning or cringing in the office this time.

My findings are very positive for this product. The lubricant really does last longer than most Hollywood marriages and happens to taste like a party in my mouth, to which all the berries are invited!
The texture is almost syrupy, making me want to pour it on pancakes and eat whilst reading a fine piece of Chaucer. The texture is also similar to your own natural lubrication, making it perfect for whatever sexual shenanigans you decide to get up to!

Conclusion
In conclusion, my hypothesis has been proven true – Sliquid Swirl Glycerin Free Blue Rasperry Flavoured Lubricant does indeed taste like Paul Daniels has blessed my tongue with his magical sorcerery (that’s not a euphemism).

There are currently no side effects from the reasonable amount of lubricant I have ingested. Therefore, I believe it is safe to conclude that Sliquid Swirl Glycerin Free Blue Rasperry Flavoured Lubricant is the ideal lubricant for oral, vaginal and anal sex, as well as ice cream sundaes.

Travelling with toys – boy held in hijack plot on US plane

editor — Fri, 25 Jan 2008 19:36:37 +0000

A 16 year old boy was detained by the FBI for plotting to hijack a plane from Los Angeles to Nashville. He was removed from the flight in Nashville where authorities discovered he was carrying “suspicious” items.

The boy was carrying handcuffs, rope and duct tape in his bag. The FBI say that “His plan had a low probability of success”. Well I guess it tdepends what his plan was, if it was to have some kinky fun in the toilets then I think his plan was not that unlikly to suceed.
The FBI said that they were not sure if the boy was trying to crash the plane and it has not been confirmed if he was carrying anything else or that what he was carrying was banned from air travel. Although handcuffs, rope and duct tape are certainly not listed as prohibited on the U.S. Transportation Security Administration’s web-site (fortunatly).

Now the facts are still unclear as to what the boy’s plans were or exactly what lead the FBI to suspect him of plotting to hijack the plane. But that’s not the part of the story that sparked my interest.

I don’t travel light and this makes me nervous. Whenever I travel by train I always get really worried about letting my bag out of my sight. I just picture it getting stolen and me trying to claim on my insurance or reporting it as stolen. Having to fill in the insurance claim form and trying to explain what exactly was in the bag.

Even on a night out in town with my mates my handbag is not exactly empty either and I hang onto it like my life depends on it.

I’m a rather impulsive person so like to be prepared for whatever mood may take me. On an average night with my mates I’d have:

a bottle of my favourite lube
lots of condoms – I’m not really into quickies
handcuffs (although depending what kind of bar I’m in I may hang them off my belt)
silk scarves ( to tie and blindfold)
some kind of mini vibrator
a digital camera

That’s if I have my small bag with me.

So when I travel by plane you can imagine what kind of “suspicious” items I’ll have with me and I always worry that I’l have to open up my suitcase. Though I’ve never really cared for duct tape and only use something like that if there is nothing else to hand. So that’s one less thing for me to worry about. I much prefer my rope.

One thing I have learnt the hard way about travelling with your tool kit is to make sure your remove the batteries!!!!! A vibrating suitcase is not that easy to explain.