Here are some great phrases that lovehoney have put together to help you get over your tongue tiedness and get you and your lover fucking like wild animals!

1. This is going to be the filthiest night of your life
2. I’m dripping wet and gagging for you
3. Fuck me now!
4. You look really sexy when you do that…
5. You can have me any way you want
6. I’m your sex slave for the evening
7. I’m naked and I’m touching myself…
8. You make me so horny
9. I want you to touch me here…
10. It drives me wild when you look at me like that
11. Put your big, hard cock in my mouth
12. Get the camera!
13. I’m gonna lick you until you scream
14. Tie me up and touch me slowly
15. You taste so good
16. I want to rub my pussy all over your face
17. Pound me into oblivion
18. Fuck me like a porn star
19. Spray your juice all over my tits
20. No-one has ever made me come as hard as you

I like 2 and 16, and there’s nothing wrong with 3. Personally, while I do love being sprayed wth cum, I would usually reserve this phrase for when a guys cum tastes bad as much prefer to swallow.

If you are gagging for more then here are plently more dirty phrases to say in bed.

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• Adveturous = likes anal
• Athletic = small breasts
• Thirtysomething = 41
• Fun = annoying
• Wild = gets drunk easily
• Beutiful eyes = ugly
• Seeks knight in shining armour = Husband fucked off with a younger model
• New age = hairy and smelly
• Headstrong = argumentative
• Enjoys pubbing and clubbing = alcoholic
• Curvy = fat
• Cuddly = fat
• Likes eating out = lazy
• Career woman = bitch
• Professional = complete bitch
• Open minded = dirty bitch
• Free spirit = on drugs and fucked up
• Passionate = dying for a shag
• Old fashioned = no blow jobs
• Seeking soul mate = stalker

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A Report by Carly “Pleasure” Drew

Sliquid Swirl Glycerin Free Blue Rasperry Flavoured Lubricant is a 125ml bottle of clear water based gel which looks somewhat like bubble bath. I love a good bubble bath, especially whilst eating marshmallows, so this particular taste test already seems promising.
The short, rather cute looking bottle has lovely graphics and a lid that matches the packaging. This co-ordination of colours pleases me, especially as I notice that it also matches the bottle of water and tissues sat on my desk. I will put them all together to create a lovely display for anyone who chooses to visit me in my corner of the office.
Upon opening the sealed bottle, there is a faint, yet delicious fruity scent. I am slightly perplexed at the name of this product as it is listed as “blue raspberry”. From my previous research, I would have assumed a blue raspberry was in fact a blueberry. However, the smell is more of a general berry odour and, depending on your preference, can be assumed to be raspberry, blueberry or even blackberry.
My theory is that this intimate lubricant, with its multi-odoured properties and delightfully co-ordinated packaging (I have also discovered that it matches the trimming on my handbag so will place that in my ever growing museum of “things that match the Sliquid Swirl Glycerin Free Blue Rasperry Flavoured Lubricant bottle”), will be delicious in flavour and could be considered as one of my five-a-day of fruit and vegetables.

Hypothesis
In order to prove my theory that Sliquid Swirl Glycerin Free Blue Rasperry Flavoured Lubricant will taste simply magical in flavour, I intend to lick the product from the back of both hands (for an unbiased opinion) then produce a full report on my findings.

Experiment Diary
14.00 – Open bottle of Sliquid Swirl Glycerin Free Blue Rasperry Flavoured Lubricant and inhale the sweet, exquisite smell.
14.01 – Consider using the lubricant as a perfume.
14.02 – Sneeze loudly in a very quiet office and headbutt the bottle in the process.
14.04 – Rub lubricant with my little finger on to the back of one hand, then rub both hands together in a clockwise direction.
14.10 – The lubricant is still moist on the back of my hands, so even if it doesn’t taste like little pixies are caressing my taste buds, it certainly does the job as a lubricant.
14.12 – Lick the back of both hands whilst hiding behind my computer screen.
14.14 – Think about going out and buying some ice cream so the lubricant can be used as a delicious topping and/or sauce for it.

Findings
The Sliquid Swirl Glycerin Free Blue Rasperry Flavoured Lubricant was licked from my hands in short, gentle licks, having learnt my lesson from the previous taste test and wanting to avoid unnecessary gurning or cringing in the office this time.

My findings are very positive for this product. The lubricant really does last longer than most Hollywood marriages and happens to taste like a party in my mouth, to which all the berries are invited!
The texture is almost syrupy, making me want to pour it on pancakes and eat whilst reading a fine piece of Chaucer. The texture is also similar to your own natural lubrication, making it perfect for whatever sexual shenanigans you decide to get up to!

Conclusion
In conclusion, my hypothesis has been proven true – Sliquid Swirl Glycerin Free Blue Rasperry Flavoured Lubricant does indeed taste like Paul Daniels has blessed my tongue with his magical sorcerery (that’s not a euphemism).

There are currently no side effects from the reasonable amount of lubricant I have ingested. Therefore, I believe it is safe to conclude that Sliquid Swirl Glycerin Free Blue Rasperry Flavoured Lubricant is the ideal lubricant for oral, vaginal and anal sex, as well as ice cream sundaes.

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Things for guys to do with their own cum.

• Hi peeps. i am just after some ideas on what us guys can do with our own cum whilst masturbating. to spice it up a bit rather than just letting it go everywhere? thank you

• Freeze it in ice cubes, then suck them next time you masturbate.

• Twice now, I have propped myself upside down against the wall and jacked-off so that my c0ck is pointing down at me and my cum shoots right into my open mouth. I’ve always wanted to do this and I finally figured out a way to do it. It’s kind of exciting. Try it guys, if you dare!

• I have wanted to try my own cum on a number of occasions, but after cumming into my hand, I am not able to go through with it. I really don’t understand it, I can’t wait to cum so that I can taste it, but when the job is finished, I just can’t bring myself to go through with it. Any suggestions? Have you ever felt this way before? If so, any suggestions on getting past this and going for it?

• I really think it would be easier to suck another guy, that way when he cums, I wouldn’t know it and would be able to take it then.

• The pastures is always greener on the other side. It always tastes better swallowing another man’s sperm. The smoothness of the dick head in the mouth feels good too. As for the dick itself, the taste is at its best when it’s unwashed for 2 days, not more, not less. The smell and taste for a dick unwashed for more than 2 days is too pungent and too salty. For less than a day, it’s just tasteless. Uncut is the best. The male juice left under the foreskin and fermented for 2 days smells simply delicious. If you are lucky, you get “Dick’s Cheese” hidden underneath the foreskin, furthest from the opening, nearest to the neck. But strangely, guys enjoy that better than girls do

Kinky things you could do in a movie theatre besides sex

• Feel her up. Let her feel you up. Sit in the very back and if there is no one near let her sit on top of you and make out. You can hump each other.

• joint masturbate, hand jobs, blow jobs, fingering, golden showers, hot lunches (now thats kinky and stinky!), dirty sanchez, bring another couple and mess with them, bring 3 other dudes and train jerk, watch the movie naked, eat pop corn outta her shirt, have her fart on your straw then drink your beverage and see if you can tell the fusion of flavors, just be creative!!!

• Cut a hole out of the bottom of the popcorn and put your dick in it.

Peeing Panties And Other Kinky Things

I LOVE peeing in my panties. When I have the time, I usually turn this into a full day and night event. I start off with a nice pair of nylon panties … for me … they have to be nylon. Cotton just doesn’t cut it. I suppose they could be satin or silk, but I love nylon … cause when it’s wet, you can see my clittie thru them. But this is how I do it. First, I start my day working myself up to the point of cumming (yes, wearing my panties). I love to get my precum flowing so that my panties get a little wet and I start getting a little gooey. Then, I put a pantyliner in my panties (kotex or something like that) and begin to slowly pee my panties. I just let little amounts of pee in, so that they don’t flood.They begin to get heavy and feel wonderful. When the pad gets really wet and i can feel the wetness on a regular basis … I get hard on and off. I can feel the wetness between my butt cheeks and I get hornier by the minute. I can’t tell you how exciting it is to be standing next to someone, and peeing in your panties. It’s so kinky … wearing panties to begin with, then a sanitary pad and peeing in your panties!! It’s so kinky! So perverted! So MUCH FUN! At this point, i ususally pull a pair of rubber panties on overtop of my panties/sanitary napkin. This allows me to continue to pee my panties (little squirts only) throughout the rest of the day without worrying that my pants will get soiled OR I will begin to smell like pee.With my rubber panties in place, now between the peeing and sweating … I get really wet and my erections come and go on a regular basis. If I get a moment of privacy here or there, i squish my clittie around and bring myself to the brink of orgasm. Sometimes, I go to far and do cum in my panties. I prefer not to at this point, but if I do, it just adds to my gooey wet erotic mess.

Cum Gargling porn sex sites reviews – Porno Tribune

These cum drinking Russian babes are just pleading for that load of jizz to be sprayed in their mouths. They love to engage in kinky cum play, watch them swap cum, blow cum bubbles, drink it out of glasses, and do all sorts of other kinky things with that man batter. They’re on their knees, pleading for it to be shot in their mouths. Wouldn’t you love to accommodate their wishes?

Shared Sexual Techniques

Well I’m not a female however, I am the husband and feel that I do a really good job if you will on getting her off to which she LOVES VERY MUCH and in return gives terrific blow jobs. She is such a tease some times and I know she wants me to play with her tits and pussy lick her clit if we have time. I will find her on her stomach with her feet and legs sticking out from the covers. She sometimes has already removed her panties. If she is awake “will you rub my legs and feet for just a minute?” Well I’m red blooded and never turn this down. I accept with pleasure.Rubbing the small of her back her legs and butt. I go all the way down to her feet and rub the soles of her feet pay lots of attention to the arch & the ball of her feet. She becomes so hot during this. I move her legs apart more and more all the time she does not stop or resisted any of it enjoys it all. As she is on her stomach, I work my way back up her legs and put one hand on the small of her back and one with my fingers in just the right place one inside her pussy. It is so wet!!! I can move around enough to feel her clit is very big and sensitive to the touch.Sometimes by now she is so horny that she rolls on over. I never loose contact with her body as she does this. If I’m not already naked I soon will be. But I keep up the finger inside her and then I also rub her clit in circler ways, and then I lick her clit. This almost puts her over the roof. I can feel her squirming and moaning she begins to tell me right there do not stop keep going, I’m close don’t stop now. She will reach out and grab my leg or anything close, her legs are jumping all over the place when she will suddenly clamp them down. She just holds it there for up to a minute shivering almost. When she is able to talk she says the room so still spinning. I gentle try and rub her clit and lips. I will sometimes go down on her and take her over the top again. Then we will have time with me inside her. Yes this site is really great, I think I will be going to the local hardware store and getting one of those hand held shower heads. I am more than wondering as to how that works. We have been taken a few showers with each other. That is also another great place and another time.My man will get on all fours on the bed. But instead of getting down below him as I would during doggy-style, I get behind him, usually standing on my knees behind him on the bed. It’s kind of a role reversal. Then, I reach around his legs and wrap my hands around his erection and proceed to lube it up with whatever fits the bill. Heightening cream will usually drive him wild. I then proceed to milk his penis, the same way he would normally do if he were pleasuring himself. But, this way, I’m in total control. He can’t go anywhere and I control the pace, holding off when he feels he will cum. Then I start up again, each time moving my hands up and down his shaft, especially focusing on the head. I make sure to point his penis downward at a 45 degree angle or more, which increases the pressure he feels with each stroke. Again, when he feels he will cum I stop stroking and put pressure on his perineum to hold him off. Then, after numerous starts and stops I begin my final milking by pointing his penis towards the ground and vigorously stroking his shaft while his sac bounces against my breasts and he moans in delight. This is a very effective technique, especially when I want to be in control or, perhaps I’m not quite in the mood for vaginal sex with him.

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So it turns out that the fulfilment of my ultimate sexual fantasy may be on the horizon. I love threesomes and have had a few in a few different formations, but there is one kind of threesome that I have so far only dreamt about. Me and two bisexual guys. I don’t know what it is specifically about this scenario that drives me wild. It probably has a lot to do with my fascination with gay porn, I love to watch guys fuck each-other, as much or perhaps even more that I love to watch straight or lesbian porn. I guess it could be because it is something I have never experienced, so it seems exotic and forbidden.

I would give anything to watch it for real, never mind being able to join in. But this potential threesome scenario gets even better. I also love the idea of being bossed around by some dominant master who makes me perform for him and do whatever he wants. So my bisexual friend it turns out has another bisexual friend who loves to be dominant and who would love nothing more than making us his obedient playthings, to serve him and do whatever he wants us to do, no matter how kinky.

I have been daydreaming of him telling us to strip naked so he could inspect us and make sure that we were worthy of being his toys. He’d have us bend over and pull our ass cheeks apart so he could have a good look. He would have to give us a thorough inspection though, he’d have to feel us all over, feel inside my pussy and finger our asses, make sure we were good enough for him. We’d be both scared about what he was going to do with us, and he’d make us touch each-other, he’d make me suck his cock and then he’d make him lick my pussy, he’d make us lick each-others asses. Then after we had performed for him if he was happy with the show we gave him then he would reward us by fucking us.

I would get to see him fuck him and I’d get to see his massive cock pounding his ass, then it would be my turn. He would fuck me senseless really hard and really deep and then he’d cum in me and the other guy would have to lick out his cum and feed it too me. So for the past three days I have been dreaming about this and have been ecstatic thinking that soon my daydream will come true.

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